Tuesday, August 11, 2015

Miles Teller Brags About His 'Highball Glass' Penis


Miles Teller's turn as a leading man in "Fantastic Four" apparently flopped at the box office, but his publicist is said to be doing damage control on a different front, trying to clean up the messy interview his client did for Esquire, in which he compared his penis to a highball glass, boasted of all the pot he had smoked and mused about his appearance, saying, “I was thinking about that today, how I probably think I’m better looking than the public thinks I am.”


The New York Times looks back at famous celebrity interviews gone wrong HERE, but I think Jezebel's Fuck, Marry, Kill game that featured Mr. Highball is far more interesting:


The case for fuck: If you're the kind of person who likes funny dudes, Teller is funny. He is also very cute and was the only really decent part of the remake of "Footloose." Lastly: "Naked acrobatics are on my resume" - Miles Teller, 2014.

The case for marry: He is good friends with Shailene Woodley, which means that if you married Miles, you could hang out with Shailene Woodley, who is basically one step away from living in a tree. YOU COULD VISIT SHAILENE WOODLEY IN HER TREEHOUSE.

The case for kill: He's never really been broken up with. "I'm always the first break up with them," Teller said in a recent interview. He also seems like the type that has a tendency to flirt with people constantly. And what happens when the laughter stops? Is he secretly just a pit of despair? Maybe you don't want to find out. Verdict: Fuck. Miles Teller looks like fun.

P.S. I'd never heard of him before today, so the interview wasn't all in vein vain.

3 comments:

joel65913 said...

He got a nice body and a face just made for radio.

Even if he were cute, he's very right when he said he thinks he's better looking than the public does, he can't even hide the fact that he's a complete douche in an interview which makes him eminently resistible. Where the hell was his publicist? Since his picture was a huge flop maybe he'll just fade away like so many other flavors of the month.

Blobby said...

He was great in 'Whiplash'.

Shy Boy said...

One of my favourite actors.

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