Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Page 1 Consider (01/16)

  • What a Tool: Just because Johan Falcon is said to have the world's largest penis (he calls his 13 1/2-inch manmeat a "curse"), did he have to wear those pants in the photo shoot? (TheSun) The close-up is here, although it's more disturbing than anything.

  • Ain't That American: What does this say about our society? USA Today reports that the broadcast networks are gobbling up cable shows to fill the void created by the writers strike. On Feb. 17, CBS will begin airing Showtime's bloodsoaked "serial killer with a conscience" hit "Dexter" and talks are under way for TNT's "The Closer" and FX's "Nip/Tuck." But what about AMC's critically acclaimed "Mad Men"? It likely won't make the cut -- it has "so much smoking." (USAToday)

  • I Don't Love N.Y.: If you can't resist the perverse desire to watch the purported sex tape of "I Love New York" star Tiffany Pollard (she denies it's her, but it sure looks like her weave to me), I have a clip of it for you here. She denies that it's her but it sure looks like her weave. (I may be a big fag, but isn't that guy way too hot for her? At least his ass is.) (DrunkenStepfather)

  • Teammates: These two Long Island hotties -- Mike Komisarek and Christopher Higgins -- are superstar hockey players up is Montreal, where they cannot walk a block without someone asking for an autograph or a picture, and where they would not dream of going out poorly dressed. So where do they go when they're craving anonymity? Home to New York. (Time for a stalking mish, perhaps?) (NYT)

  • Curtain Call: Three-time French Open champion Gustavo "Guga" Kuerten will retire from professional tennis after playing at Roland Garros this year. Luckily, he look will live on in spirit of "Laguna Beach" cast member and Open Air Stereo frontman Chase.(AP)

  • Coming Around Again: Former high-end designer turned cheap-chic designer Isaac Mizrahi, who helped create the image of Target as a style destination, has defected from the retailer on Tuesday to a more ambitious, and lucrative, role of making over the struggling Liz Claiborne label. (NYT)

  • Bad News Beards: The NYPD has decided it won't rest until all of its officers look like embarrassing stereotypes. A Jan. 8 memo clarifies a regulation that says officers are permitted to sport mustaches but are not allowed goatees, chinstrap beards (think Abraham Lincoln) or other "designer beards," like Mike Piazza's creative facial hair when he played for the Mets. I can understand having a grooming policy, but do they have to enforce one that encourages everyone to look like a '70s porn star/all-around douche bag? Oh, well. At least it reminded me that the new season of "Reno 911" premieres tonight on Comedy Central. (Newsday)

  • Gay Men's Health Crisis: A new, highly drug-resistant strain of the “flesh-eating” MRSA bacteria is being spread among gay men in San Francisco and Boston, researchers reported Monday. (NYT)

  • Mac Daddy: Matthew McConaughey and his girlfriend, Brazilian model Camila Alves, are expecting a baby. Does his becoming a father mean that he has to wear a shirt now? I wonder how he broke the news to Lance. (AP)

  • Breathes Without Oxygen: Oprah Winfrey's starting her own television network -- called the Oprah Winfrey Network -- that will feature her face on the screen 24 hours a day. It seems O wasn't controlling Oxygen as much as she wanted to, so now she's pretending like she never had anything to do with it. (NYT

  • Quote of the Day: "It’s good that I just did Maria. I didn't want to do any of the other tennis players." -- Novak Djokovic after his first-round win over Benjamin Becker at the Australian Open. (Reuters)

    A.M. Villalobos said...

    Add this one to the stack if you havent already seen it:

    "Is that a pocket-full of extra tennis balls or are you just happy to see me?"

    Anonymous said...

    McBongo gonna be a daddie? I'm guessing all that practicing with Lance paid off

    Anonymous said...

    Oh why did I click that NSFW link? Now I'll need some sort of hypnosis to get that awful image out of my head. I read an article about that guy a fews years back. It didn't include the Full Monty shot. Wow, what a freak show.

    Anonymous said...

    too long.hard to blow.i'd rather have the grapes and the normal least,they're blow-able.
    just like bubbles.

    i do pity that guy.well,hope he's as straight as stick cuz women don't even have the skills of
    "blowing kisses".then he can copulate with vajayjays *grin*
    (no offence to the real women of the world)