Page 1 News (05/16)

Justice is Blind Deaf: A third man was indicted in the Duke lacrosse rape case yesterday. David Evans held a riveting press conference after the charges were announced in which he proclaimed his and his teammates' innocence. "You have all been told some fantastic lies," Evans said. "And I look forward to watching them unravel in the weeks to come as they already have in the weeks past, and the truth will come out." What was most surprising, however, was Evans' contention that DA Mike Nifong has flatout refused to even speak with him, something veteran prosecutors say is completely unheard of given the fact that even in the most airtight case it would be advantageous to speak to a defendant in the hopes of catching him in an inconsistent statement later on cross-examination. Truly stunning turn -- and with new DNA evidence showing the woman had semen from one and only one man in her: her boyfriend. (WP)

Sleight of Hand: A female-to-male tranny who deceived his wife with a homemade penis for 17 years lost his parental rights to his wife's daughter at the Court of Appeal in Britain yesterday. Shouldn't the wife be charged with being retarded? (PinkNews)

Love in Bloom: It was just a matter of time before the Philadelphia Eagles developed a mancrush on Jeremy Bloom (Eagles site via Towleroad)

Karl Rove: How much longer do I have to look at this fucking idiot? (WP)

Product Placement? Suck at baseball? Blame ADD (What happened to the H? Guess his mind is so all over the place he forgot it.) ... (AP)

As the Clay Slides: Roger Federer nearly beat clay court specialist Rafael Nadal this weekend in Rome, so this year's French Open could be the best in decades. Nadia Petrova's victory over herpes-mouth bitch Justine Henin-Hardenne was good news too, for so many reasons. (AP) (Also: Federer-Nadal Is Starting to Have That Frazier-Ali Ring via TimesSelect)

Late Check-In: Thieves Steal Paris Hilton's Mother's Day Gifts / No word on her brain. (AP)

She's Like the Wind: Talk about acting: ABC announced a new relationship-based drama on its fall line-up called "Men in Trees" starring Anne Heche as an author who quits a speaking engagement in Alaska after being dumped by her fiance (hee hee) and finds herself happy to be stuck in a snowstorm with lots of available men (hee hee). I wonder if the daughter of God and half-sibling of Jesus, Celestia, will be making any cameos ... (NYT)