Tennis Tuesday: Raphael Collignon

Oh, to be a 6-foot-three rising Belgian tennis star. More of the 24-year-old BELOW.

Remains of the Day (10/19)

NL Times: The Netherlands’ first openly gay prime minister, Rob Jetten, and his fiance, Argentine hockey star Nicolas Keenan, are expecting a baby via surrogate next spring

KCM: A closer look at why some politicians' professed love of the Second Amendment has little to do with gun rights

The Caftan Chronicles: Rocco Steele, 62, says his famous endowment helped him earn enough to retire comfortably -- and dishes on his decade in porn, his marriage and his globe-trotting new life in Taiwan

Boystack: Two masters of the male physique get their due with “Uncle Roy” at NewFest and Stanley Stellar’s new photo book, “Don’t Worry Boys”

Brian Ferrari: Four hours of ’60s girl groups, spooky divas and ill-fated boyfriends make for a Halloween soundtrack to die for

Daddies With Issues: Two gay Gen X best friends tackle twink death, divorce, Grindr in their 50s and chemsex recovery in a new podcast debuting Oct. 25 

Out in STL: Rodney Wilson remembers two (adorable) gay uncles who died young and reflects on the lives they never got to live

Sydney Morning Herald: Saint Etienne’s Sarah Cracknell reflects on fame and how it changed her outlook on love

Out: Ranking 11 of Andrew Scott's most entertaining and gayest roles

Stolen Holiday: Jackie Paris had a singular voice, legendary admirers and an ego to match — so why did jazz stardom elude him?

WKRN: Outrage in California as Andrew Luster, the Max Factor heir convicted of drugging and raping unconscious women, walks free after serving roughly 20 years behind bars -- his original 124-year sentence having been reduced to 50 years

Outreach: Your old photos, letters and memories matter — preserving LGBTQ history starts with saving our own stories

Gay City News: What to watch during the second half of NewFest’s LGBTQ Film Festival

EW: Ellen DeGeneres tells Graham Norton she misses being on TV and floats a British comeback, four years after her talk show ended 

Bristack: What happens when the dearly departed divas of gay culture return as zombies? 

Hot Cat of the Day: From a chic Thai model to a surfing kitty in Hawaii, five celebrity felines charm fans with their style, grit and surprising talents

RIP: Michael Forest, the strapping actor who played Apollo on “Star Trek,” dies at 97, months after receiving 600 letters from grateful fans

Weekend Tennis Roundup

 

Alejandro Davidovich Fokina triumphs in Shanghai; Maja Chwalinska scores a Wuhan breakthrough; Zheng Qinwen makes history in Beijing; plus a viral courtside treatment and more BELOW.

Here Comes the Mirror Man

In a new interview with Super Flattering, photographer Elay Neal Moses touches on something I spent much of my 20s and 30s grappling with: When I would meet a guy I found attractive, I was often confused -- did I want to be with him or did I want to be him? 

As a gay man, the line between desire and aspiration could be confusing, especially when I was younger and still figuring out who I was. (I suppose the one advantage of being a breeder is not having to deal with this issue!) 

Moses, who came of age in the internet era, describes having similar feelings while looking at male models on Tumblr: "As a gay man, there's an extra question: do I want to be like him, or do I want him? The line between the two can be pretty blurred." 

Of course, the answer could be both -- think boyfriend twins. But it's a fascinating little insight into the way gay men can experience attraction, admiration and insecurity all at once -- and one I wish I'd heard someone articulate decades ago.

Elsewhere in the interview, Moses touches on another aspect of this phenomenon: how we can adore qualities in other men that we're unable to appreciate in ourselves.

"I've always been drawn to imperfection," he says, before wondering why it's so easy to embrace those qualities in others but so difficult to accept them in himself. (I, myself, am famous for loving a guy with a paunch -- so sexy -- yet hate myself for not having a six pack.) 

I was also struck by Moses's thoughts on aging and the idea that growing older is a privilege. It's something I've become increasingly aware of, especially since losing my big brother, who I'm now four years older than when he died. His cancer ordeal really drove home how lucky the rest of us are to still be here. 

Of course, knowing that intellectually and actually feeling it when you're bombarded with Instahunks 24 hours a day -- that Mark Zuckerberg is on to me -- are two different things. (Why I would be measuring myself against someone young enough to be my grandson in the first place is anyone's guess, although Peter Pan Syndrome is undoubtedly at play)

Maybe the key is learning to appreciate what you have instead of constantly comparing yourself to others, judging yourself against who you used to be or dwelling on who you never were -- as painful as that last one can be.

Read HERE.

Remains of the Day (10/16)

KIT212: Ex-Jets QB Mark Sanchez reaches settlement with truck driver he pummeled in booze-filled attack

People: Not at all surprised that Timothy Busfield's child sex abuse indictment was thrown out after a judge found prosecutors improperly prevented grand jurors from hearing witnesses who could have supported his defense. He probably was a creep to some females, but everything about this "molesting little boys" case sounded specious.

Boystack: Glenn Close makes a surprise appearance at NewFest's opening-night screening of the acclaimed Spanish gay drama "La Bola Negra"

Mombian: Revisiting an early book about lesbian parenthood offers a reminder that gay families have a much longer history than many realize

Saturday 'Stache: He's what's known as a "Kenny special"

Artnet: Cyndi Lauper looks back on her gloriously outrageous style as she auctions off decades of iconic outfits, including pieces created by Screaming Mimi's founder Laura Wills

Fox Illinois: LGBTQ elders share the lessons they want younger generations to carry forward

Attitude: Chick-fil-A's CEO squirms through an interview about the fast-food chain's controversial history with gay rights

Out: David Beckham's son Romeo makes his acting debut in "Forty Love," a French gay romance about rival tennis players who fall for each other 

Brian Ferrari: A not-safe-for-work remembrance of pioneering gay actor and activist Michael Kearns

SCMP: A scheduling conflict forces the cancellation of Hong Kong Pride Parade's Rainbow Market, with no alternative venue available

The 19th: Meta faces scrutiny over anti-LGBTQ misinformation spreading on its platforms ahead of the midterm elections

NYT: Revisiting the origins of Jason Voorhees in "Crystal Lake," Peacock's prequel series to the "Friday the 13th" horror franchise

Instinct: What gay men need to know about Grindr's growing use of artificial intelligence

Speedo Sunday: Putting the muscle in Muscle Beach

Hot Cat of the Day: Turtle comes home after 571 days and a two-state adventure

Mormon interruptus: This one's for all my gay classmates in Mesa

Blond Farewell: Blondie to return with new and final album "High Noon" next year. Hear the "Pollinator"-reminiscent first single, "Spectral Eyes," HERE. Tickled to read they're also covering a song off erstwhile keyboardist Jimmy Destri's sublime "Heart on a Wall" album, but did they have to pick the one with barely any lyrics ("Little Metal Drummer") when every other track has Blondie written all over it? 

On the Rag, Vol. 929

This week's rag 'n' mag roundup features Parker Gregory, Adam Lambert, Corey Fogelmanis, Mina Hartong, Paul Anthony Kelly, Tom Hiddleston, the sexy boys of "La Bola Negra" and more BELOW.