Arizona State of Mind

Experienced a bit of a rite of passage last night when I met up with my only nephew for the very first time as "adults" -- no parental units within thousands of miles! It was awfully sweet. 

AJ, who is pursuing a degree in construction management in Tempe while his little sister just began studying forensic psychology in Vermont, is dating the lovely Natalie (also in white), whose childhood friend Ava moved to NYC after graduating from Arizona State. While it's true that they "grow up too fast," I can't imagine his having turned out a more thoughtful and compassionate straight white man, which god knows the world needs more of. My sister and her husband did good. xo

Big shout-out to Sarabeth's and Scarlet on the Upper West Side, both of which provided exceptional service. 

It's always interesting to hear what people recall from their childhoods, so I was tickled last night when AJ hearkened back to when he was "scared" one Halloween of Grandma, whose scary mishap with her SUV I wrote about back in 2007 -- the same make of vehicle that 11 years later allowed Mom and my stepfather to live through this. Woman is Built Ford Tough! 

Remains of the Day (10/31)

Attitude: Rob Jetten could become the Netherlands’ youngest and first openly gay prime minister as his party takes lead in the polls

Gr8er Days: Maria Riva, only child of Marlene Dietrich and author of her mom's definitive bio, has died at 100

The Advocate: Ex senior CDC director warns of more severe mpox spread

NME: Debbie Harry and Chris Stein on Blondie in the '90s, "No Exit,", and how the future looks without Clem Burke

Washington Blade: Former Irish Prime Minister Leo Varadkar on Europe's role in global LGBTQ rights movement 

Trick or Treat: 5 sexiest Halloween costumes I've seen in 2025

People: Are Stevie Nicks and Lindsey Buckingham finally ready to kiss and make up?

Instinct: Luke Evans to play Frank-N-Furter in "Rocky Horror Show" on Broadway

Attitude: Jacob Elordi thinks people are "really going to like" season three of "Euphoria"

Just Jared: Feast your eyes on Ryan Phillippe at 51

The Atlantic: Israel’s critics have canceled themselves. (Withholding submissions from The New York Times in order to promote your views is some odd logic.) 

MetroWeekly: Gay New York Democrat Erik Bottcher sets fundraising record one day after filing to run for Rep. Jerry Nadler’s congressional seat

Out: "Boots" star Max Parker is "Red Hot" in resurfaced calendar pics

SCMP: Harvard HIV scientist Xie Zhenfei joins China’s national virus lab in Wuhan

DNA: Jonathan Bennett unwraps 10 new hunks for “Finding Mr. Christmas”

The Fight: Matt Bomer confirmed to return for “White Collar Renaissance” reboot

Queerty: Singer Duncan James reportedly dating hunky dancer two months after splitting from ex

Out: "911 Nashville" star Hunter McVey strips down to a pair of tight white shorts in new photoshoot

Saturday 'Stache: An "Inside Out" dad Halloween costume ignites "hellscape" of X hate

AP: Teacher shot by 6-year-old sues assistant principal: "I thought I had died"

People: Benson Boone posted a gym photo showing off his 8-pack abs and toned legs

The Advocate: Oklahoma youth mental health improves after Ryan Walters departure

DNA: Cheyenne Jackson and Luca Castellani star in a romance set against ICE raids

OutSFL: How Florida’s infamous "Purple Pamphlet" shaped LGBTQ history 

Hot Cat of the Day: Those papers aren't blowing anywhere!

LOL: Apparently Danny Pintauro isn't the only guy in the history of the world to get HIV from not having butt sex

Paste: The 30 greatest albums of 1985?

Caption Me

 

I need your help, guys. Do any of you remember a real photo of two gay men that circulated 10-15 years ago that mimicked the 1957 shot of Sophia Loren and Jayne Mansfield, famously taken at a dinner in Beverly Hills at Romanoff's to welcome the Italian star to Hollywood? The "Jayne" in it, as I recall, is wearing a light blue dress shirt and has sandy/auburn hair. I can't even remember what I wanted it for, but I'm so OCD that I won't be able to sleep unless someone sends it to me. Until then, here's an AI-generated attempt. While I'm not a fan of artificial intelligence, I wouldn't kick the blond out of bed for not being human! 

On the Rag, Vol. 881

Fran Tomas, Christian Hogue, Renan Pitanga, Alex Cancel, Crystal Waters and more in this week's rag 'n' mag roundup BELOW.

Remains of the Day (10/29)

 

PinkNews: Gay porn star Brent Corrigan says "massive seizure" left him on life support

Washington Blade: Virginia election to determine future of LGBTQ rights in state

The Advocate: Texas Supreme Court rules that judges can refuse to marry same-sex couples

DPA: Charles unveils U.K.’s first national memorial to LGBT military personnel

I 🩷 the UWS: Plans revealed for Metro Theater’s transformation of long-vacant Art Deco landmark

Wrestle Wednesday: When you wear your best singlet to the gym

SCMP: Ginger lovers can't get enough of Max Parker, who plays Sgt. Sullivan in "Boots"

Gayety: Grindr shareholders propose $3.46 billion deal to take app private and give greater control of platform

Greg in Hollywood: Gio Benitez celebrates 40th birthday with hubby who writes: “You inspire, uplift, and make us all feel seen and loved”

Attitude: Annie Lennox wants to use her voice "to help empower girls and women around the globe"

East Bay Times; Man charged in homophobic attack on Bay Area LGBTQ bowling league

Just Jared: There's really no reason to keep watching "Finding Mr. Christmas" now that studly former NFL player Jake Schum got eliminated ... meet this season's queer HERE.

The Athletic: Shirtless dudes are taking over college football

People: Hmm. 95-year-old sculptor Jackie Ferrara ending her life through medical aid despite being in good health.

MetroWeekly: Maine Senate hopeful Graham Platner is sorry for past homophobic posts, says he's evolved 

Mug Shot Wednesday: All is forgiven, cutie

BBC: "Fawlty Towers" star Prunella Scales dies at 93

Queerty: Netflix delivers a sexy gay surprise for Halloween with an assist from Antoni Porowski

Hot Cat of the Day: When you're almost as big a boy as Dad

Cindy goes indie: Cindy Wilson on her new EP and the B-52’s tour

Queerly Beloved: A Night Out With Femmes and Friends

 

A quick shout-out to Suite Bar and its "Femmes and Friends" comedy show, which Damian and I attended last night. Although we mainly went to see rising star Conor Janda -- hilarious as always -- the whole lineup was pretty entertaining, most notably Amy Cui, who had us dying! 

Find Amy HERE

Find Conor HERE

After his set we fanboyed over Conor, telling him how much we like his "Boys Club" web series, which you can watch HERE.

We’d never been to Suite Bar, which technically sits on the Upper West Side (109th and Amsterdam) but is a bit of a trek from our place near Lincoln Center. Still, it’s adorable -- super welcoming, with a big bar, comfy leather booths, karaoke nights, and the requisite drag shows. Not sure why it has two Instagram accounts, but you can find Suite Bar online HERE.

Note: Femmes and Friends happens the last Monday of each month -- mark your calendars -- and you can learn more HERE.

Eat your heart out, Bobby Womack! 

Tennis Tuesday

 

Watch Garrett Hawley DDS try his best BELOW.

Belly Brings 'King'-Sized Show to NYC

I would be remiss not to mention that we caught Belly in concert on Friday night celebrating 30 years since the release of their sophomore album, "King," which effectively ended the band at the time. Considered a commercial failure after the "Star" debut  -- which had the alt radio hits "Feed the Tree," "Slow Dog" and "Geppetto" and garnered them a best new artist Grammy nomination -- I've always considered it to be the superior of the two, sounding like a cohesive album rather than a bunch of songs collected over time. And now three decades later, others are re-evaluating it -- and even coming out to celebrate it, if the sold-out show at the Palladium Theater was any indication. 

The band started off shaky, with word that they were all recovering from Covid that they'd caught on the U.K. leg of the tour. But once they got going, playing "King" in the sequence of the original LP and then taking a 15 minute break before returning to paly their other hits and misses, as well as my all-time favorite B-side, "Spaceman," it ended up being an unforgettable night. As some of you may agree, Tanya Donelly is an underappreciated singer and songwriter, whose turns of phrase have been leaving me gobsmacked since my 20s, so I will go see her any chance I get.

Special shout-out to fellow '90s alt darling Tracy Bonham, who delighted the crowd by joining in on her two favorite Belly songs, "Slow Dog" and "Feed the Tree," which you can see a bit of below:  

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Tracy Bonham (@tracybonham)

Take a bow

(BTW: I'm still getting a handle on that venue, which sort of took over for acts of this caliber when B.B. King's club closed. Sometimes the Palladium has tables throughout -- like when we saw En Vogue -- and sometimes it's mostly standing with just a few tables around the perimeter. Thinking that it would be like the En Vogue show, I paid for a table and then wound up in the very back of the joint -- having inadvertently shelled out extra to guarantee the worst seat in the house!)

Remains of the Day (10/27)

The Caftan Chronicles: David Drake was once the twink who loomed over the West Village -- then he revitalized the Provincetown Theater

PinkNews: Where does Ireland’s new president Catherine Connolly stand on LGBTQ rights?

Michael Musto: Hangin’ with Beverly D’Angelo and Morgan Fairchild at Chiller Theatre

Attitude: OnlyFans star Drake Von defends controversial "1,000 bottoms" challenge, says he want to spread the word about safe sex

A+E: Two best friends killed one of their moms: The real murder behind "Heavenly Creatures"

SCMP: Absolutely loved Rose Byrne's Apple TV show called "Physical," and now I'm also enjoying "Platonic," and not just because of Luke Macfarlane's outrageous body

GLAAD Inaugural Black Queer Visionaries Summit charts path to safety and liberation for LGBTQ Southerners

Them: Lia Smith, missing 21-year-old trans student, found dead by suicide in Vermont

BBC: Trial starts for 10 conspiracy theorists for sexist cyberbullying France’s first lady

Interview: The making of Judd Apatow, by Cameron Crowe 

Boystack: Jimmy James, the world's greatest Marilyn Monroe tribute artist, talks about his origin story, his fandom, his craft and the career he was destined to have as he prepares a revealing documentary

MetroWeekly: Police in "moderate" Indonesia parade 34 men after gay sex party raid

Out: For "Boots" star Angus O’Brien, kooky Hicks is more than chaos and camouflage

Denverite: Windows smashed at multiple Denver LGBTQ businesses

Attitude: Crumbl Cookie co-founder Sawyer Hemsley enjoys romantic vineyard spa getaway with boyfriend Antonio Bruno

Hot Cat of the Day: When you're a hulking personal trainer and a tender cat dad!

RIP: June Lockhart, last of the black-and-white sitcom moms who was perfect as Leon's mom on "Roseanne," dies at 100

Weekend Tennis Roundup

 

Titles for Fonseca, Sinner, Bencic and Li. Full report -- plus all the ATP beef that's fit to post -- BELOW.

Remains of the Day (10/24)

Gr8er Days: 100 most memorable "Golden Girls" guest spots as the show turns 40, including the time Mr. Grant's ex wife (Edie) caught up with the Happy Homemaker(!)

MetroWeekly: Funny how churches can always find a good use for a gay man

People: Benito Skinner and Terrence O’Connor break up after 9 years of dating

PinkNews: Supreme Court sets date to consider same-sex marriage challenge: What it means and what happens next.

Weekend Fling: When Saturday 'Stache met Speedo Sunday

Provincetown Magazine: The hilarious Mike Albo has a new audio memoir: "Hologram Boyfriends: Sex, Love, and Overconnection" ... available to pre-order HERE

Patch: Joseph Paul Seider, the (now ex) drummer of the New Pornographers who spied on boys in Chick-fil-A restroom sentenced to three years in state prison

Out: This Russian gay couple deserves U.S. refuge, not persecution

Washington Blade: Erasure laws are the new frontline of anti-LGBTQ hate

Us Weekly: Soccer star Landon Donovan discusses "insane" reaction to his new hairpiece

California Luxury: Phyllis Lindstrom slept here, sorta

Instinct: When does a twink become a twunk?

Psychology Today: Now, more than ever, LGBTQ people need community

AFP: Swimming Australia refutes fabricated anti-LGBTQ quotes linked to Olympian Kyle Chalmers

Attitude: David Geffen’s estranged hooker husband drops lawsuit -- but now he's claiming the billionaire mogul is hiding his finances

Hot Cat of the Day: Gregory Nalbone is a proud cat dad!

Hello, Nurse: Blake spent three years in conversion therapy before he could escape

RIP: Dave Ball, the musical force behind Soft Cell, dies at 66 after long illness

On the Rag, Vol. 880

This week's rag 'n' mag roundup features Jayson Glick, DJ Matt, Kevin Davis, Jeremy Allen White, Bram van Adrichem, fall grooms and much more BELOW.

Another Case of Neko

After that DEBACLE last fall in Tarrytown, we gave Neko Case another "chance" Wednesday night at the Beacon Theater -- and she definitely didn't disappoint. 

Leaning heavily into her wonderful "Neon Grey Midnight Green" album -- her first release since 2018 -- Neko's voice and mood were in top gear throughout the evening, as she zig-zagged through a set that also included a healthy dose of material from "Fox Confessor Brings the Flood," "Middle Cyclone" and "Blacklisted." (As it would happen, "Hell-On," which is the first solo album of hers I really got into, was ignored.)  

I've probably said this before, but it's worth repeating: Debbie Harry, Chrissie Hynde and Carly Simon are just lucky I didn't discover the New Pornographers chanteuse until the 2000s, because I have to figure the only reason she's not my No. 1 -- that voice! those lyrics! that phrasing! how does she come up with this stuff???? -- is because there's just no way to "catch up" with favorites who have been embedded in your DNA since your childhood. Even after playing Neko's solo music more or less nonstop the past year I still only recognized a fraction of what she played last night and only a couple times did I get the chills they way I do during an entire set of one of my legacy artists. (But when I did get them ... "Magpie to the Morning" ... swoon!) 

In no way does this diminish how much I appreciate her. In fact, that I hold her in such high regard after a relatively short period, or have adopted her at all, is probably the highest compliment someone like me -- who still regularly listens to albums from 1978 on repeat -- could give. 

Great night. Setlist below.

Setlist: 

“Bracing for Sunday,” “People Got a Lotta Nerve,” “Louise,” “Deep Red Bells,” “This Tornado Loves You,” “Little Gears,” “Baby, I'm Not (A Werewolf),” “Ragtime,” “Magpie to the Morning,” “I'm an Animal,” “Destination,” “Lady Pilot,” “Oh, Shadowless,” “That Teenage Feeling,” “Rusty Mountain,” “Match-Lit,” “Neon Grey Midnight Green,” “Tomboy Gold,” “Wreck,” “Star Witness,” Encore: “I Wish I Was the Moon,” “Hold On, Hold On,” “At Last.”