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Frosty Patron: A Wendy's manager was shot in the arm for refusing to give a customer 10 packets of hot sauce for his chili, claiming it violated the store's strictly enforced sauce policy. I had a similar incident with my Chicken McNuggets at the McDonald's on 50th and Broadway. If I'd only had a gun that sweet and sour would have been so much sweeter and sourer ... (NBC)

Lancelot: Wait. David Hyde Pierce was in the closet? (AE)

Hack Attack: A man with a form of tuberculosis so dangerous he is under the first U.S. government-ordered quarantine since 1963 had health officials around the world scrambling Wednesday to find passengers who sat near him on two trans-Atlantic flights. Is this why I can't stop coughing? (AP)

Hairy Situation: Debra Opri, the onetime lawyer for Anna Nicole Smith's baby-daddy, Larry Birkhead, is suing him claiming he didn't pay his legal bills during the paternity dispute involving the child. She also wants to be reimbursed for frosting his hair. (AP)

Faithless: Pop tart George Michael: Once a mess, always a mess? (AP)

St. Tropez Bound: Do you know where to draw the tan line? (NYT)

A Number of Years of Solititude: Nobel Prize-winning Colombian novelist Gabriel Garcia Marquez returned Wednesday for the first time in a quarter century to his birthplace and inspiration for the fictional town Macondo, immortalized in his masterpiece "One Hundred Years of Solitude." (AP)

Daddy-O: Train wreck Lindsay Lohan's class-act dad says his famous daughter is addicted to OxyContin. Of course she is. (AP)

No Laughing Matter: The Laugh Factory has finally made an honest woman out of Jon Lovitz. (AP)

Infinite Wisdom? Do you think Steve Stanton -- soon to be Susan Ashley Stanton -- didn't get the job as city manager of Tampa because she told her prospective employers during the interview that having a transsexual city manager would not be problematic or disruptive for the staff. How does she know? (Source)