Page 1 Consider (03/28)

Pretty Women: Scarlett Johansson Tops FHM's 'Sexiest Women' Poll / Angelina Jolie slipped to No. 2 when people finally remembered that she's fucking crazy. (AP)

That Sinking Feeling: A Ford Explorer sank into a Brooklyn street. Really. (NYT)

k.d. lang academy: Lesbian's Girlfriend Banned from the Prom / What did they expect -- it's an all-girls school. (AP)

Tip Your Terrorist: 'Dirty Bombs' Crossed U.S. Borders in Test / Great. Now the evil doers know all about this. (AP)

Jumping Jackoff: A gym coach in Illinois has been banned from working with children at a Catholic school after it was discovered that he was a former porn star. These Catholics -- unless they can be in the video they don't want anything to do with ya. (PinkNews)

Tiara Optional: Contestants from Eight Nations Added to the 2006 International Mr. Gay Competition / This is so funny: I was Mr. Gay in my 9th grade gym class. (GayWired)