Mask4Masc

"Excuse me, my mask is up here." 

Page 1 Roundup (03/25)

The Daily News: So even if we are to accept that Trump's campaign chairman gave Russian spy Konstantin Kilimnik 75 pages of polling data merely for shits and giggles, could someone at least tell me why Trump sucks Russian c**k 24 hours a day?

California toddler mauled to death by dogs, grandparents tried to save him

New York Post:  Headline doesn't even match the story, let alone the actual findings listed in Barr's memo

Pit bulls reportedly attack, kill owner in Texas

Tumblr: Most erotic purchase of all time?

Yahoo: Rob Gronkowski announces his retirement after nine seasons with Patriots -- does this mean he'll DO PORN now?

The Guardian: Musicians like me need to fight against the giants of YouTube and Google, writes Debbie Harry

ICYMI: Did the Mets acquire Pete Alonso to beef up it bulge appeal?

Jezebel: “Is the left unhealthily obsessed with cancellation culture and sniping at each other rather than focusing on our real enemies?” I’ll save you from 4,500 words: Yes.

The Stranger: If for some reason you're still curious who Lauren Duca is, read this instead

The New York Times: Mueller report stops short of exonerating Trump of obstruction of justice

NYT Editorial Board: No collusion, no ‘exoneration’ A Trump-friendly attorney general’s letter doesn’t do justice to the special counsel’s investigation. Release his whole report.

The Wall Street Journal: Selfie-seeking tourists are crushing California’s superbloom

Morning Wood

Morning Wood

Morning Wood

Lethal Weapon (UPDATED WITH VIDEO)

Patriots tight end Aaron Hernandez charged with murder; team drops him

 From my friend Tony:

Forget about marriage equality, let's talk about what was in Aaron Hernandez's gym shorts during that perp walk this morning.

Best evidence ever!

(UPDATE) Bloomberg has the most bouncy gym shorts footage here:

UPDATE:

Five years later, Conor McGregor gives Aaron Hernandez a run for his money. Oh, to be this one's cellmate ...

Bulge-gate

Talk about your hard-hitting journalism: The Daily Mail isn't buying that David Beckham's package is all him. Read HERE.

Eric Decker Bulge Report

As you may have read here, Denver Broncos wide receiver Eric Decker's fiancée claims his dick is a third leg. A kind reader has submitted these three photos below to support the theory -- and I've selected the, um, header photo above. What do you think?

Eric Decker Has an Enormous Schlong

I swear, I try not to be obsessive. But then my eagle-eyed readers keep digging up stuff and what's a blogger to do? As if Denver Broncos wide receiver Eric Decker and his fiancee weren't already the couple I'd most like to see leak a sex tape, his boo adds this titillating detail about his legs to the mix:

The closest I can get to confirming this is HERE and HERE.

And when I say Eric Decker and his fiancee are the couple I'd most like to see make a sex tape, of course I mean actual couple ...

Morning Wood

Walking Down Madison

I swear Jon Hamm never had a gun, but whatever's in his pants sure looks loaded (click above photo to enlarge). Of course, it's not the first time the Dapper Don has teased us with his bulge.

Tuesday Ad Watch

Jockey clearly hired a gay man to handle its advertising.

Caption Me

His Super Bulge is still one of my blog's highest-ranked posts, with the skinny-dipping one right behind.

9021Oh-my!

Unloading Only: We all knew Donna Martin was a fool for refusing to put out in high school, but who knew that her nerd boyfriend David Silver was packing such heat? I guess Donna and David's wedding night really was the best night of her life ... just ask grabby Megan Fox.