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Why does Sony need to copy-protect Celine Dion's new CD when they could barely bribe DJs to play her last one? (USA Today)

SCOTUS wannabe Sam Alito Downplays 1985 Abortion Statement, tells women to "abort all they want!" (ABC)

Who's Who in America 2006: When the Olsen twins get twice the space as the president of the United States, you know the world is in serious trouble. (NYT)

We needed an FBI profiler to tell us this about the 18-year-old boy who shot his 14-year-old girlfriend's disapproving parents? "Kara Borden may well be simply a young teenager who had a special relationship with someone believed by others to be too old for her. Perhaps David Ludwig shared her feelings and just couldn't take being told that he could not have a relationship with her." Yeah, I'm guessing that shooting two people at pointblank range would "perhaps" indicate that he "couldn't take being told that he could not have a relationship with her." (MSNBC)

The Washington Post's review of Madonna's "Confessions on a Dance Floor" sounds about right, now if Amazon would just deliver the damn CD to my house ... (WashPost)

Dallas Newlywed Police Officer Fatally Shot: Leave it to FoxNews to make this man's marital status part of the news, like it would have been less tragic if he were single? (FOX)

I hope she has rollover minutes: Cell Phone Bandit, Boyfriend Held in Robberies, Police Say (LoudounTimes-Mirror)

Remember how compassionately the Catholic church handled victims of sexual abuse? They're even more compassionate when murder is involved (WashPost)

The (fake) doctor is in: Playing Pharmacist to Friends (doesn't everybody do this?) (NYT)

American Heroes: Names of the Dead (NYT)