Monday, May 30, 2022

Weekend Tennis Roundup


Depending on what time you read this, Damian and I may already be in divorce court based on the outcome of today's Nadal-Djokovic quarterfinal in Paris. (The King of Clay is looking very fit so I don't have high hopes, which makes what happened Down Under -- where Novak has the huge advantage -- even more vexing.) But until then, here's what I've gathered over the past week, starting with a proxy Manspread Monday starring Andreas Mies and Kevin Krawietz that has me wondering how they were already eliminated. (Somehow was able to concentrate playing against that?!) Full report BELOW.  

Back to the '80s: Holy, Kathy Rinaldi -- four teenagers in the French quarters! 

With Holger Rune and Carlos Alcaraz both reaching the French quarterfinals, it's the perfect excuse to share these adorable photos from their younger years. The Great Dane got a nice writeup in The New York Times where we learned that the two played about 10 times as juniors, with Holger thinking Carlos leads the rivalry 6-4. How incredible would it be if they somehow wound up in the final? 

I think I know why Jayson Mathiou hasn't accepted my Instagram follow request!

Is this Carlito's way ... or the trainer's?

Goodbye, Mr. Mackenzie

Mackenzie McDonald had a nice run to the third round, with coach Jaime Pulgar in tow

Sasha's hot older brother definitely doesn't need any help

Guido Pella's legs are hawking beer 

And his eyes are hawking sex

Christian Harrison is getting a little long in the tooth for the Futures circuit, but he's definitely in peak porn position 

Brotherly love 

Young Republicans 


Matteo Berrettini doesn't seem to be missing the ATP

Ryan Harrison and someone who looks just like his ex-wife make it Instagram official

Andrea Pellegrino was the big winner in Vicenza

The Lock brothers won another rinky-dinky doubles title, but it was Benjamin's NET COVERAGE that got me all hot and bothered 

Ben and Courtney 

If you thought Christian Harrison was a GOP tool, try following his equally hot 'n' toolish friend

Matt Ebden and Sam Stosur had a nice run to the quarter 

Gilles Simon ended on a high note, upsetting Pablo Carreno Busta for his 500th victory 

And enough couldn't be said about the career of Jo-Wilfried Tsonga, who never failed to excite 

Urban cowboy Jan-Michael Gambill 

The rancher at work

Stefanos isn't smiling any longer 

I'm guessing Alex Robein recuses himself from calling BFF Albano Olivetti's matches 

Filip Krajinovic really does those white shorts ...


Can't blame these ladies for getting a pic-with this one!

Corentin Moutet seemed to enjoy having his clock cleaned by Nadal

And he sure put on a show ...

Indian Wells honcho Larry Ellison -- who strikes me as the biggest closet case -- is even worse than we thought 

Grass men: James Duckworth looking like a million bucks with countryman Alexei Popyrin

Botic van de Zandschulp's coach, Peter Lucassen, is one hot piece of ass

Brandon Nakashima's hot box

Victoria Azarenka's hot box

Marton Fucsovics: Apparel by Wacky Packages

Paula Badosa has a type 

Andy Murray says Wimbledon prep is going well 

I'm buying whatever Jack Draper is selling

Tobe Simon in the house of fun

(As long as I have a face, he has a place to sit down.) 

Tommy Paul shows feet

Belgian delight Arnaud Bovy

Did I tell you I got into it with Rennae Stubbs for admitting Novak Djokovic's 2020 U.S. Open default was the result of a careless but completely unintentional act yet continuing to needlessly pile on about it? 

I'm glad Borna Coric finally broke his losing streak ...

But I've already moved on to countryman Borna Gojo

See him in action HERE

Marcos Giron got killed in the first round of singles and doubles, but still looks like this 

Ooh la la: 32-year-old Jonathan Eysseric

You know I'm hot for Liam Broady if I can overlook those embarrassing tattoos! 

Qinwen Zheng's hot box ... and I love her game too -- especially her fluid service motion!

Cesar Ramirez hooks another hot piece

Sturdy David Vega Hernandez had a nice run to the doubles quarters 

Ernesto Escobedo channels his inner Jose Eber 

Jürgen Melzer's pose is turning me on

Hot couple alert: Andrea Vavassori and Enzo Couacaud

Looks like a great uncle to me

Get out the lube to watch Christian and his "golf buddy" Mitchell Good

An American in Paris

Here's wishing Damir Dzumhur a speedy recovery from his horrifying case of acute pancreatitis

Karen Khachanov had a nice run to the round of 16, knocking out Cam Norrie along the way

Lorenzo Musetti may have come up short against Stefanos Tsitsipas, but only on the scoreboard

Quentin Halys sure doesn't look like he lost in the first round of singles and doubles

I pray that Jule Niemeier got spit-roasted by Florian Nowy and Christopher Kas and filmed it

Looks like Bosnian Nerman Fatic knows how to entertain himself

Borna takes a romantic stroll 

The highlight of Emma Raducanu's tournament

Alma had her wet dream come true ... or was it mine? 

John Lloyd has a new memoir out and while he's awfully pretty to look at, his "kill me if I can't get hard" take on prostate cancer and friendship with Crazy Donald are major turnoffs. Read HERE.

And last but not least, a shoutout to the SportsBubbleButt IG account!

1 comment:

martini421 said...

Great round-up as always Ken. Really appreciate this weekly post as I am a huge tennis fan. We definitely have a lot of favorites in common!
FYI, in case you don't know, the hottie with Paula Badosa is Sergio "Kun" Aguero, a legendary soccer player with Manchester City. He recently retired due to a health condition. He is one of my favorite footballers! Thanks for posting! Paula is a lucky woman!