Had a great conversation last night with my pal Greg, my BFF growing up in Arizona. Like myself, his newspaper job is about to dry up as his company prepares to consolidate operations to various editing centers around the country. As a result, he is plotting his next move -- by a series of events, he's currently in Mountain Home, Arkansas -- and has his sights set on Tulsa, a place he's never been. I've never been there either -- or anywhere in Oklahoma -- but I've heard some good things about it and the research he's done has all been promising. Wondered if any of you readers could provide some insight into what life for a 40-year-old gay man would be like there. He and I are planning a reconnaissance visit this spring and would like some pointers!Monday, January 03, 2011
Oklahoma ... OK?
Had a great conversation last night with my pal Greg, my BFF growing up in Arizona. Like myself, his newspaper job is about to dry up as his company prepares to consolidate operations to various editing centers around the country. As a result, he is plotting his next move -- by a series of events, he's currently in Mountain Home, Arkansas -- and has his sights set on Tulsa, a place he's never been. I've never been there either -- or anywhere in Oklahoma -- but I've heard some good things about it and the research he's done has all been promising. Wondered if any of you readers could provide some insight into what life for a 40-year-old gay man would be like there. He and I are planning a reconnaissance visit this spring and would like some pointers!
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I don't have first-hand experience but someone posted the same question on Datalounge once and it was not considered a gay-friendly community at all. Especially for a man of a certain age hoping to make friends with others of his ilk, as there was an entrenched gay social set described as people who wouldn't spit on you if you were on fire. Of course, DL tends to bring out the negative in people, but I once moved to a particular city in the Midwest for a job and posted about it asking for advice and people there told me absolutely not to do it and they were correct.
It's a very pretty city with a lot of interesting art deco architecture and a very pretty park by the river. I went to a quite nice party there a year or so ago. The hosts and most of the guests were gay and there is apparently quite a community in Tulsa.
I grew up in Norman, and have spent a lot of time in OKC and Tulsa. There's a reason I live in NYC. It's not terrible--but definitely check it out first. People are warm and friendly but there is an undercurrent of entrenched fear of anything different. It's getting better! I still wouldn't move back, because there are absolutely no jobs for what I do, but the cost of living is tempting. I think the only thing that will make the climate better for the LGBT community out here is having MORE of us here, visible, and living our normal lives alongside the Sally Kerns.
I've been to Tulsa several times...and considering that this is Oklahoma, I found them to be quite gay-friendly. Certainly, Oklahoma City is a bigger city, and more "cosmopolitan" it's not a very pretty place. I think Tulsa and it's environs are quite nice.
For fun, you could try to sneak onto the campus of the Oral Roberts University and see if you set off any alarms...and if you don't, you could ask where to find the Gay Students Union.
Don't listen to Bucky or the other negative nellies...
I live in Tulsa, I'm a gay man approaching 40 and I love it. I'm not an Okie - actually moved here after living in Atlanta, Houston and Toronto and although I had some concerns about moving to the reddist state of the nation those concerns quickly dissipated. It is quite cosmopolitan and I think more so than OKC (and it's prettier).
There is a great (small) gay community and a surprisingly large supportive group of progressive straight people. Tulsa and Oklahoma have a bad reputation because of Sally Kern and people who have never been here.
It is more than OK and it's getting better. The only thing that I noticed at first is that folks are a bit 'cliquey' but that's everyone here.
Two great resources for Tulsa gaybies are TYPros (Tulsa Young Professionals, typros.org) which has a great Diversity group and a fantastic LGBT Center: OkeQ (okeq.org). Just don't judge them by their itty-bitty Tulsa Pride.
Welcome!
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