Even More 'Tubular' Festival Coming This Summer

 

As I've mentioned, I generally hate music festivals. But where was this line-up -- even sans Dave Ball (RIP) -- when I let my guard down for the Totally Tubular Festival last month?! I quickly ran afoul of the male singer from Animotion when I mentioned that these things typically attract the "wrong" nostalgia acts. (No word on how Astrid Plane feels.) But if I'm honest, I just as easily could have cited "headliners" Men Without Hats and A Flock of Seagulls, especially when compared with the Human League, Soft Cell and Alison F**king Moyet. All I can say is I doubt tickets will go for 22 bucks the day before!

Am I his obsession? 

Bow Wow Wowed: An ’80s Queen Braves Totally Tubular

Like, ohmygod! The 2025 Totally Tubular Festival was totally not as grody as I thought it might be! (OK, enough of that -- I'm already exhausted.) Despite my well-earned reputation as an '80s fanatic, these kinds of things are (totally) not my style: A) I hate festivals/drawn-out concerts; B) I'm very selective about the music I listen to -- especially to see performed live; and C) These things invariably pick the wrong nostalgia acts (think Animotion, the Escape Club or a Stuart Adamson-less Big Country). 

But as it would happen, not one but two of my favorite artists -- Bow Wow Wow and the Motels -- were included in this lineup. And then they started to give tickets away -- $22(!) -- with the venue all but walking distance from my apartment, at which point I decided: Why not? 

Security was a nightmare, so we ended up arriving as Tommy Tutone was performing a (not surprisingly extended) version of "867-5309/Jenny." Given the fact that the next couple acts did just three songs each, the most we missed was two, which was a bit of a shame given that front man Tommy Heath was in fine form at 78. Shockingly, I learned that the band had actually scored another Top 40 pre-"Jenny," in 1980's "Angel Say No," which has to be the answer to the hardest question in the Trivial Pursuit Totally '80s edition. (You're welcome.) 

Next up was Bow Wow Wow, aka Annabella Lwin. With guitarist Matthew Ashman six feet under since 1995 and her relationships with drummer David Barbarossa and bassist Leigh Gorman also long dead, Annabella has had to fight to keep performing as Bow Wow Wow since Gorman likes to perform under the moniker with singer Chloe Demetria, which sounds about as sad as the Culture Club sans Boy George and Divinyls sans Chrissy Amphlett attempts of recent memory. Annabella looked and sounded great as she came out to the band's second single, "W.O.R.K. (N.O. Nah, No No My Daddy Don't)," the 1981 protest song satirizing the Thatcherite push for work in austerity-era Britain. From this deep cut they pivoted to "Do You Want to Hold Me?" and "I Want Candy," the group's two highest-charting singles in the U.S. Always a pleasure to see that one but boy would I have liked more.  

Then came Martha Davis and the Motels, which included longtime keyboardist/saxophonist Marty Jouard, the brother of lead guitarist Jeff Jouard, who was booted from the band back in the day in favor of Martha's then-boyfriend Tim McGovern. (Those were some awkward holidays!) Martha wasted no time in singing "Only the Lonely," followed by a haunting version of "So L.A." (great choice!), "Suddenly Last Summer" and "Strange Days." Martha is the main reason I decided to go -- interviewing her in 2008 remains a blogging highlight -- because she's 74 and recently had a second bout of breast cancer, which first struck her at the height of the Motels' popularity in the early '80s. (Producer/manager Val Garay says she also had early stage cervical cancer.) I'd love to see her perform a full set, but at this point any Martha is better than no Martha. Unlike so many of my legacy artists, Martha is still making music that stands up to her heyday output, and I'm hearing 2026 will see the birth of even more. Here's hoping she's in the mood to travel again to celebrate that. (Listen to the albums "This," "Beautiful Life" or "The Last Few Beautiful Days" if you don't believe me.)

UPDATE: I ended up rewatching their episode of VH1 "Bands Reunited" (adorable) and finding a full concert from earlier this year at the House of Blues in Anaheim, which was the perfect salve. It's 18 songs, with the perfect combination of early material ("Dressing Up," "People, Places, Things," "Counting," "Closets & Bullets") along with the tracks that made them famous. (She even does "Remember the Nights"!) Good to know that Martha is still up for a full set. I guess the caveat is that I'll probably need to go West if I want to experience it again ... they're playing the Whisky A Go Go in April!

The Motels were followed by Thomas Dolby, who hilariously announced that he was the only artist on the bill who had "never broken up and gotten back together" and still had all its original members. I've always been a fan, but even I was surprised by how terrific his set was, bolstered by his doing "Europa and the Pirate Twins" and "One of Our Submarines," two of the best songs of the 1980s. He also did "Hyperactive" and, of course, "She Blinded Me With Science," the projected video of which featured a surprise cameo by Hillary Rodham Clinton, to the delight of the crowd. 

This is where I got a little confused. Because they were billed toward the top, I somehow had it in my head that Men at Work was next. If this makes me sound like an idiot, please note that neither the Aussies nor Men Without Hats were ever bands I ever got particularly excited about -- but I definitely know the former was way bigger than the latter, so at least I knew something was off. The Canadian synthpop-sters got off to a bad start, with singer Ivan Doroschuk bouncing around like a Super Ball to what turned out to be "The Safety Dance," only the microphone malfunctioned, so it took a good minute or so before it was fixed. Next, they did songs called "Moonbeam," "Where Do the Boys Go?" and "Antarctica" before performing their other hit, the delightful "Pop Goes the Word." From there they announced that they were doing what every '80s fan dreads hearing -- "a new song" -- before launching into the on-the-nose "I Love the '80s," which by the end had the crowd singing along. (OK, it was kinda cute.) To the producers' credit, they then allowed the band to take "Safety Dance" from the top -- which took me back to when I saw A Flock of Seagulls in 1983 and they did "I Ran" twice ... without sound problems! -- announcing that this was for "anyone who'd arrived late"! Worth noting that one of the band members wasn't a man and one of them was in fact wearing a hat, yet they charmed me in an unexpected way. 

*I would argue that the Motels are the second biggest band on the bill, but I've read that Martha prefers to go on early -- plus Men Without Hats are more lively, so perhaps it makes sense for them to go on later.

So while I'm still not sure how Men Without Hats ranks "second" among the artists on the bill, the fact that they're not the at-work men explained how A Flock of Seagulls soared to the top of the bill. Fondly remembered as the quintessential one-hit wonder of the new wave era, the group did in fact have a few chart hits, so it was great hearing "Space Age Love Song" (my personal favorite), "Wishing (If I Had a Photograph)" and "The More You Live, the More You Love" -- as well as "Say You Love Me" and "Some Dreams" -- before closing the night out with ruckus version of "I Ran." Although grumpy frontman Mike Score is the only original member -- even his drummer brother has long flown the coup -- touring bassist Pando(TM), who reminded me of Toni Basil if Toni Basil had an eating disorder, knows how to keep the crowd engaged. 

All in all, a fun night in a roomful of like-minded fans, some of whom were more dedicated to the cause than others. 

If you hurry, you can see clips from most of the artists on my Instagram stories HERE.

Jon Cryer Theads the Needle

 

Bravo, Duckie! 

New Wave Exhibition in Orlando Leaves Me ‘Torn Apart’

As much as I want nothing to do with the state of Florida, I'd be lying if I -- who lives a stone's throw away from several of the most celebrated art museums in the world -- didn't admit to having exhibition envy after seeing this photo from "Torn Apart: Punk + New Wave Graphics, Fashion and Culture, 1976-86," on display through Feb. 2 at the Orlando(!) Museum of Art. (There's probably a snooty joke in here about how only in the Sunshine State would music posters qualify as works of art, but it probably says as much about me as it does them since I totally agree that they are!)

Andrew Dineley writes:

[The exhibition] brings together an extensive collection of punk graphics and ephemera, Malcolm Garrett, MBE’s collection of garments designed by Malcolm McLaren/Vivienne Westwood for Seditionaries and SEX, and Sheila Rock’s photography. One of the most comprehensive punk exhibitions to date, "Torn Apart" highlights the brilliant designs of the era and the designers who created them. Graphic design and music in the punk era were closely fused; designs in print were the public face of the music, with the visual often as important as the music itself. The exhibition includes iconic works by Jamie Reid (Sex Pistols), Peter Saville (New Order/Joy Division), Raymond Pettibon (Black Flag), and Barney Bubbles (Elvis Costello). On view are approximately 400 posters, 200 flyers, 400 pieces of ephemera (zines, clothing, buttons, stickers, etc.), over 30 garments, and 30 photographs by Sheila Rock.

As Prefab Sprout would say: Swoon!

See if you can spot Blondie's "Parallel Lines" and "Eat to the Beat" in the photos above and below.

Learn more HERE.

 

In addition to transporting me back to my childhood bedroom -- and those of friends Greg and Mark -- I found the cutoff year of 1986 to be interesting. When I surveyed a bunch of my Gen X friends to come up with lists of favorite new wave songs and albums, I got pushback from some for choosing anything beyond 1984, which struck me as a tad premature. I graduated from high school in 1985 -- with Tears for Fears ruling the charts -- and I can't think of a more quintessential new wave band than those guys. 

Nonetheless, as appealing as the Orlando show is, I'll be settling for browsing the catalog online as I already have to give money to another problematic state later in the week since we're traveling to Arizona to celebrate my brother Terence's birthday! 

Below: Arizona walls of sound. 😎

In my room, summer 1983

My cat Tweet in 1983

Greg in his bedroom, circa 1984

With Chantal in 1986

With Greg and Chantal 

Chantal's got milk 

‘Heart♥throb’: Young Girls Seek Men to Pay Their Bills

Came across this commercial for the late '80s board game "Heart♥throb" on social media the other day and couldn't believe what mercenaries these little bitches are!  (At least gay boys only care about hot bodies.) 

 You almost have to admire Milton Bradley for not sugar-coating the purpose of heterosexual relationships. 

Idle Remorse has a full review of the delightfully shallow scheme, but here are my picks:

I'm thinking I should probably marry Jeff -- he's boyfriend cute and clearly we have a lot in common(!) -- and then just f**k Chip ...

and Randy ...

and Brad and Patrick (and at least make out with Matt)

Fingers crossed that none of my guys are the one who "chews tobacco"(!) -- but I’d definitely like to be gal pals with the boy who "cuts class to watch his stories." (I'm looking at you, Ricky.) 

For an update featuring the Trivago guy and Chris Evans, keep reading BELOW.

Billboard Dance Chart for Jan. 15, 1983: Get Up and Do Your Thing

Looking at the past through rose-colored glasses might not always be fair. 

But there's no doubt that popular music -- where a pre-Top 40-fame Thompson Twins, Patrick Cowley, Sylvester, Weather Girls and an unknown chick from Detroit co-mingled with the likes of Prince, Marvin Gaye, Grace Jones and Hall & Oates -- used to be insanely good. 

BTW: I didn't even mention Indeep's "Last Night a D.J. Saved My Life," which may just be the best song the week. That might explain why it's been sampled a million times since! 

A New Wave Xmas

 

Hope you're all having a Merry Christmas! I'm actually working today -- the news never stops -- but I had a wonderful time with my in-laws last night celebrating the birth of Christ. (That's what this is about, right?) While I was in Arizona for Thanksgiving I came across a bunch of old photos I didn't even know existed, mostly from the early '80s when I segued from Oliva Newton-John into my Debbie Harry phase (I'm holding the Blondie singer's official 1983 calendar, above) which continues to this day! More BELOW.

My mom really went cuckoo that year, shopping at the "punk" store called Roads to Moscow in Old Town Tempe!

#ThrowbackThursday

Was tickled to death to receive this old photo from my childhood friend Lisa in Detroit the other day. From my hair I'd guess it was the summer of '85, at the height of my Paul Weller/Style Council obsession -- right before my friends and I drove up to Toronto to basically go record shopping! (I was walking alone one night on Yonge Street when I got cruised for the first time, which scared the hell out of me!) I wish there were an app that could magically send everyone photos others have of them that they never knew existed -- what a wonderful world it would be! 

Senior (High) Living

This meme made me smile -- sign me up -- leading me to a search of the haunt where my "Fast Times at Dobson High" played out: Fiesta Mall (RIP). 

Was tickled to discover this photo of the Musicland where my friend Greg purchased "Madonna" she same day I bought “She's So Unusual" at the height of the great Madonna vs. Cyndi Lauper War! Also seen is the Sears -- the mall's first anchor store -- where my classmate Donna Sullivan worked, decked out in the coolest mod fashions and smoking cloves on her 15-minute breaks. Below: Fiesta Malls three other early anchors -- The Broadway, Goldwaters and Diamonds, which was the fourth anchor in the mall's before being replaced by Dillard's! 

The rise and fall of Fiesta Mall

Greens 'n 'wiches in the food court

P.S. And look what's in the news today!

Developer files initial plans to redevelop shuttered Fiesta Mall in Mesa

When J. Crew Catalogs Were the Biggest Deal in Fashion

If International Male was hardcore porn for the burgeoning gay back in the day, J. Crew was definitely the source of some softcore fantasies. Long before the Abercrombie & Fitch quarterly, we had to get our kicks where we could -- and not every thrill involved a mesh tank top. 

Now a new book looks back at the publication that apparently got straight people (and actual fashion seekers) pretty excited too.

 

Eric Spitznagel writes:

Thirty-five years ago, print media was having a renaissance.

And the uncontested leader of the medium, with more cultural relevance than most magazines or books, was a clothing catalog, delivered free of charge to every home in America, 14 times a year.

During the ’80s and early ’90s, J.Crew was more than just a clothing mail-order business.

Their catalogs embodied “the delicate brine of a clambake wafting in the air; the particular romance of a misty morning at a rustic lakehouse,” writes Maggie Bullock, author of “The Kingdom of Prep: The Inside Story of the Rise and (Near) Fall of J.Crew” (Dey Street Books).

In other words, they offered a fantasy, something that customers weren’t getting from conventional retail. 

Kelly Hill, a future catalog stylist for J. Crew, told Bullock that during her college years in the late ’80s, the “arrival of a new J.Crew catalogue was an event.” Hill’s roommates would “pour over each glossy page, beer in hand, shrieking over their favorite characters.”

It was a ritual that had little to do with shopping. This wasn’t something college students did “with Lands’ End or L.L.Bean,” Bullock writes. “You didn’t do it with Glamour or Vogue, either.”

Keep reading BELOW.

Order HERE.