Page 1 Roundup (10/19)

The Daily News: Could you just give us one f**king day without this bullshit?

The New York Post:Hot firemen and baby animals make the world’s best calendar

The New York Times: My Wife Found My Sexy Phone Pics and Won’t Let It Go

The Wall Street Journal: A Comedy Show Thrives by Avoiding Vulgarities—Such as the Word ‘Gosh’

Page 1 Consider (01/28)

I'm sorry, but who gives a flying fuck what the Mormon -- or ANY OTHER -- church thinks about gay rights? Does no one remember the separation of church and state anymore? Why are we even reporting on this? THEY don't make the laws. THEY don't get to decide who gets rights. And they're only saying this to try to embed their own discriminatory policies into the law. Fuck off.

NYT: John Dehlin, Mormon Critic, Facing Excommunication

The New York Times reports that the Mormon Church has moved to excommunicate the prominent Utah-based founder of an online forum for critical or doubting Mormons, charging him with apostasy for supporting same-sex marriage and the ordination of women and for questioning church teaching -- to which I say KUDOS! That's what they should do if that's what they believe. You can't have it both ways, gay church farts. Either you believe it or you don't. Stop trying to make people who hate you accept you -- MOVE ON and they will eventually die out and have no followers. I'm sorry if you love the "pageantry" or "traditions" of the religion you grew up with and don't want to give them up. You don't agree with their fundamental beliefs, -- like the right to not be treated like a second-class citizen -- so privately keep the "good" parts but DO NOT give them your time, money or affiliation. By associating with an anti-LGBT religion, you're just enabling them to make the next generation of gays and lezzies feel like shit about themselves. Religion isn't like sexuality -- it is a choice. Stop choosing to be abused by these assholes.

If they want to fuck with us in a bakery, that's another story.

 Watch the movie, lose the church

Steve Young's Touchdown Pass

Sure, Craig James -- No. 9 on my Hottest NFL Players of All Time list -- may have let us down by saying we were all going to hell. But then Steve Young -- No. 13 -- turns around and agrees to speak at a Mormon conference on LGBT acceptance! This doesn't come as a complete surprise seeing as Young's wife rallied aginast Prop 8 while her church worked to fund it. But Steve stayed out of that fight, so it's nice to see him getting involved, especially given the number of suicides of LGBT youth in the LSD church. Might be time to re-rank the men! Read HERE.

UPDATE: Watch Young speak at the conference HERE.

Missionary Position

I may have grown up in a predominantly Mormon area, but I don't remember anything like this going on. (These guys really fill out their magic undies.)