Bananas

What do you know? Zack Morris and I had something else in common besides two-toned hair!

Page 1 Roundup (04/22)

The Daily News: Citi Bike riders hurt on faulty e-bikes lawyer up, describe grotesque injuries

Ukraine follows in U.S. footsteps, elects TV clown with no experience to be its leader

 Three mountain climbers, including one American, confirmed dead in Canadian avalanche

59-year-old creep sexually assaulted teen after luring him with dating app

Grindr: What this guy said was shitty, but I have to say I have gotten numerous bitchy messages for not responding

Rolling Stone: Mueller report sinks Trump’s approval rating to new 2019 low

Twitter: What kind of monster tosses seven newborn puppies into a Dumpster and walks away?

Vulture: The best thing about this "Saved by the Bell" reunion is Kelly Kapowski's hot hubby

ABC News: Judge finalizes $25 million settlement for 'victims of Donald Trump's fraudulent university'

New York Post: Sri Lankan government knew possible bombing was coming

Ohio teen missing for a week found buried in shallow grave -- is there a gay connection?

Pete Buttigieg compares Bernie supporters and Trump fans

Pride Media CEO Nathan Coyle abruptly resigns to helm Ford Modeling Agency

Towleroad: High school yearbook reveals Pete Buttigieg was declared ‘Most Likely to Be President’

The New York Times: Death toll in Sri Lankan terrorist attack tops 300; about 500 injured

The Wall Street Journal: I guess it's no longer "Netflix and chill" 

Twink Zack Morris Is Now a Bear 'Pitch'-er

At 42, I'm wondering if "Saved by the Bell" alum Mark-Paul Gossleaar's playing a baseball pitcher is a sci-fi show. But his new look -- reminiscent of Cubs hunk Jake Arrieta -- is definitely eye-catching, including his also POSING NUDE.

Beachy Keen

Went with friends to see "Bayside: The Musical" on a recent Saturday night. Although I'm way too old to have "grown up" with "Saved by the Bell" -- "The Real Live Brady Bunch" is obviously my sweet spot -- but I was part of the population who discovered the show in reruns in the early '90s, which led to a prime-time ""College Years" followup. The show was sort of a witless update of "Ferris Bueller's Day Off." But with Mark-Paul Gosselaar as its leading man -- and A.C. Slater as his hunky partner in crime -- it was like cat nip for every girl and gay man who came across it, and ripe for a parody. "Bayside: The Musical" doesn't disappoint, far smarter and, of course, in on the joke. The actors playing Zack and Slater aren't shy about taking their shirts off -- and even when he's dressed, A.C. is in a singlet (thank god) -- but it's the young woman playing Jessie who steals the show, with her multiple addictions -- caffeine-pills, studying, getting into Stanford -- and impromptu "Showgirls" moments. I won't lie, I didn't get all of the inside jokes (make sure you refresh your memory as to who Tori was). But the tickets are cheap, and if you're a little bit younger than me -- OK, a lot younger than me -- you'll have a great time. And even if you're just a casual fan, there's enough here -- including some surprisingly clever songs -- to enjoy. Tickets and show information HERE.

Zacking Off

Did you happen to see guest host Ross Mathews interviewing Mark-Paul Gosselaar on "Chelsea Lately" last night? Mr. Saved by the Bell was there with his "Franklin & Bash" costar, Breckin Meyer, and told the already-giddy Ross that he had heard him on Howard Stern recently talking about the two guys who influenced him most as a child -- which, MPG explained, is "another way of saying who you masturbated to." He then proceeded to tell the audience that Ross cited Justin Timberlake and, you guessed it, Zack Morris as his childhood fantasies -- then did a victory fist pump, explaining how he bragged about it later to his wife! (Breckin, looking dejected that it wasn't him, chimed in, "Well I guess I can go f**k myself.) Ross claimed he didn't even remember saying such a thing on the radio -- "We talked about a lot of things ..." -- but then flirtatiously replied: "But I don't deny it." Forget about marriage equality, guys. This is what I call progress!

McSandy

 

 

If a shirtless Zack Morris (Mark-Paul Gosselaar) or young A.C. Slater (Mario Lopez) aren't enough to get you to watch this 1991 "Saved by the Bell" beach volleyball clip, then maybe a fresh Eric "McSteamy" Dane as a would-be date rapist will. Hat tip to the L.A. Rag Mag boys.

Rock Hudson Mario Lopez and the Hooters Mom

Don't get me wrong. I like me some A.C. Slater as much as the next gal. But there's something awfully staged about these "oh, you caught me out!" photos with what the National Enquirer calls a "Hooters bombshell." (What's up with the Happy Meal cup?) We're being told that ladies' man Mario Lopez is cheating on his "Dancing With the Stars" partner Karina Smirnoff with this chick, but strangely these photos just make me think he's saving the last dance for Zack.

(Credit: David Perel/National Enquirer)