Page 1 Consider (10/31)

Lost in Love: We all knew Brad Pitt had lost it when he fell under the spell of that freak of nature Angelina Jolie. Nonetheless, even she can't be held accountable for this stupidity ... (VanityFair)

Hot Sauce, White Sauce? An argument that started over cutting in line at a popular Middle Eastern food vending street cart turned deadly when one man stabbed the other to death, police said. With fried balls involved, it was bound to happen ... (NYDN)

Church of the Poison Mind: Why do men hate going to church? There's not enough swearing and Internet porn. Solution? A macho man church that "lets guys be guys" (good Lord). (Newsday)

Step by Step: Looking healthy, curvy and strong, Whitney Houston was flawless as she made her return to the spotlight in old Hollywood glamour, donning blonde locks and an asymmetrical black Armani gown in what has to be considered one of the greatest comeback attempts of all time. (You go, girl!) (AH)

Is This a Good Idea? Male Contraceptive Halts Development of Sperm (MNT)

No Agenda: When everything you touch turns to shit Karl Rove sends you out to bash the gays: "For decades, activist judges have tried to redefine America by court order,'' President Bush said Monday in Statesboro, Ga. ''Just this last week in New Jersey, another activist court issued a ruling that raises doubt about the institution of marriage. We believe marriage is a union between a man and a woman and should be defended." (AP)