Page 1 News (05/08)

Tranny Get Your Gun: A Bronx cable access channel is the home of "Strange Fruits," a soap opera that's sort of like "Dynasty" -- if "Dynasty" "starred mostly untrained, unpaid actors and followed the exploits of a transsexual Southern belle turned Bronxite with a knack for stealing babies, poisoning people and cursing." Are you listening Time-Warner Manhattan? (NYT)

Looking out for love. Big, big love. (AP)

So NoTORIousTacky: Barely four weeks after her divorce was finalized, Tori Spelling "took the plunge" again on a beach in Fiji, marrying a guy who was married with a newborn daughter and a 7-year-old son when they met. Apparently Tori met her new husband while filming a Lifetime Television movie in which she plays a brain-damaged 30something woman. Once again, life imitates art. (AP)

The Wright Stuff: After beating the Atlanta Braves 2 games to 1 in their weekend series, the Mets now have the best record in the National League. What's going on here? (AP)

An American Hero: Sister Rose Thering, who led a tireless crusade against anti-Semitism, has died at 85. Thanks for all you did to make this world a better place, Sister Rose. (Source)

Mission Aborted: Although $48 million at the box office may sound like a lot, apparently it's not at all what the producers of the new Tom Cruise sequel were hoping for. Has the American public wised up to this pompous midget? (Reuters)

DIY Dentistry: Everyone knows Americans like to make fun of British teeth, but even health-care-challenged Mexicans have jumped on the bandwagon: In Mexico, protruding, discolored and generally unfortunate teeth are known as "dientes de ingles." Apparently DIY Dentistry -- or Do-It-Yourself -- is the best many Brits can get thanks to resource-strapped state-funded dental service there. (NYT) (The Do-It-Yourselfer in this photo is only 43 years old.)

Belgian Express: Injury prone Kim Clijsters is back in fine form powering her way to the title in Warsaw on clay. (BBC)