Kem Lab

Stephen Colbert: Using the R-Word Is 'Totally Gay'

Stephen Colbert gets a visit from Tim Shriver of the Special Olympics, who wants people to stop using the word "retard."

Today's Dish: David Wright

More dishy ball players -- Jeter, A-Rod, and Guy With iPhone Grady Sizemore -- serve up their secret recipes in the new book, "Diamond Dishes: From the Kitchens of Baseball's Biggest Stars."

Kim Cattrall Is Not a Fan of Page Six or My Name Is Not Ken(dra)

Fans of Hollywood and media -- and where the two intersect -- will find this item about Kim Cattrall on Page Six today absolutely fascinating. A reporter from the famed gossip column caught up with the leggy blonde after the premiere of her new film, "Meet Monica Velour," in which she plays an '80s porn star who now strips to make ends meet. (It's kind of a "Sex and the Trailer Park.") Apparently Cattrall was ranting about the discrimination women of a certain age face in Hollywood -- sort of an odd point for a 54-year-old to be making at the premiere of HER film -- then got even crankier when she realized she speaking to The New York Post.
PageSix reports:

When we tried to break the ice with Cattrall, mentioning a ridiculous tip we'd gotten earlier in the day about her getting a bikini wax -- a well-tackled subject on "SATC" -- she snapped, "That's a stupid question. You're a smart girl. How could you want to write that?" She then turned her anger on gossip columns, specifically Page Six, despite our being big fans of hers. "It'll chew you up and spit you out," she said, leaning in and adding that being a gossip reporter just isn't a "respectable job." Cattrall asked, "Why don't you work at -- what's that news agency -- Roybers?" When we corrected her, "Reuters," she conceded, "Yeah, sorry, I've been drinking." But she didn't stop there, ranting, "What about writing for a blog? Then you can write about what you want [or] care about."

I found her last comment to be the most interesting, probably because the question I get asked most often by readers I meet is whether or not I have another job. When I see yes, nine times out of 10 they seemed positively stunned -- which makes me smile because it seems preposterous (to me, at least) for someone to think that I could make a living off of "my life" -- let's face it, I'm no Kendra -- yet it implies that I put enough work into my site that it seems like a full-time career. (Thanks!)

To answer Cattrall's question for whichever smart "girl" from Page Six got asked it: We would (just) write for a blog, if we could make enough money off of it!

"Meet Monica Velour" opens April 8 -- and I cannot wait to see it!

Thursday Ad Watch: Tim Tebow for Jockey

They keep saying they're coming, but I still haven't seen Tim Tebow wearing any undies for his big Jockey campaign. (At least we get to see a flash of him shirtless in the teaser below.) Still, tell me the 23-year-old virgin doesn't have you longing for some Jim Palmer '80s bikini action like HERE!

Watch:

Gossip Guys: Who Is Ed Westwick's Hot Friend?

Anyone know who "Gossip Girl" star Ed Westwick's hot date was at the Knicks-Nets game last night at the Garden? (Note to Chuck Bass: I think he's just not that into you.) More HERE -- the boyfriend has my AirCast on!

Meredith Baxter: 'I Didn't Know I Was a Lesbian'

Nancy Locke and Meredith Baxter with closet-caseworker Howard Bragman at an awards show in November

Today, I give you the third and final installment of Christopher's book report on Meredith Baxter's memoir, "Untied." The actress finally gets around to having sex with women, yet still doesn't think it makes her gay.

Christopher reports:

Miss Baxter's first "lesbian revelation" comes when she discusses her conscious choice to dress like a MAN during her custody battle with Birney. She claims the depositions were so "threatening" that she had to butch it up. She wore wing-tip oxfords, blazers, and cut her hair very short. Meredith thinks she should "probe" this issue more as it could be seen as a "foreshadowing" of her eventual coming out. Girl, PLEASE!!! Your choice of attire rarely has any indication on your sexual orientation. Just ask Tyler Perry!! He spends most of his days in a dress and he's COMPLETELY straight.

After butching it up for the court, the perfect "butch woman done wrong" movie of the week made its way to her. "A Woman Scorned, The Betty Broderick Story" was filmed in 1991. Mare LOVED Betty. She could relate to her because Betty was privileged and was treated very badly by her ex-husband. Of course Broderick KILLED her ex and his new wife. No worries, Meredith passes no judgment and completely understands how that could have happened. She found the role "therapeutic" and enjoyed pretending it was David's house that she drove a car through in one of the scenes!! She also enjoyed punching her co-star Stephen Collins. She states all this violence was "cathartic" for her and allowed her to get in touch with her anger towards David Birney. I hope for his sake, he has a restraining order against her. In fact, let's keep her out of the Walmart firearms section while we are at it!!

Read the full report HERE.

Cut to the Chase

I see he also, um, popped the question to Ronnie Kroell, Reichen Lemkuhl and Tucker Carlson. (Via Twitter)

Top Chef: Rocco DiSpirito

I never saw his old reality show on NBC, but Rocco DiSpirito was definitely the hottest thing at Bravo's upfronts yesterday in New York. Apparently the handsome chef will have a summer show on the network called "Rocco's Dinner Party."

The best thing out of the L.A. upfronts was, obviously, the return of "The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills"!

All-American Barbie

I bet people wouldn't complain about dolls and models not looking like "real" people as much if we replaced them with truer versions of ourselves. Reminds me of the hilarious episode of "Veronica's Closet" when Kirstie Alley's character was so excited that they were making a doll of her -- and then the prototype had a double-chin! (Ronnie was not happy!)

Morning Wood

You Knew This Day Would Cum

Further proof that Michael Patrick King and Lisa Kudrow had their fingers firmly on the pulse of the future of pop culture with their groundbreaking HBO series, "The Comeback," comes word about a new competition reality show to find South Africa's Next Top Porn Star. (You may recall "Valerie Triumphs at the Upfronts," where her network unveils its new reality-show fare, including "America's Next Great Porn Star.") (Lisa Kudrow and Dan Bucatinsky recently discussed this particular prediction at the Museum of the Moving Image in Queens.) The show will crown a male and female winner, who will star in Hustler magazine's end-of-the-year film and receive a cash prize of approximately $720. We can only hope the monetary prize is used for a check-up and a delousing. (Thanks, Brian!)

BREAKING: Hot Couples Make Bitchy Queens Angry

Diss and make up 

 Yikes. Remind me to never become young and handsome and on the cover of INSTINCT magazine. Less than 24 hours after Eric Turner and John Odom's love story hit the Web -- they're getting MARRIED -- here's what commenters have to say. (Hint: All 13 are vicious, from allegations of lying and cheating to steroids and planned M2F surgery.) Don't feel bad, Eric, I had three testicles too!

(Click for maximum bitchiness)

It's a good thing these guys are used to dealing with bitches

The Breakup Song (and Dance)

I'll Have What She's Having

David Beckham and Sofia Vergara seems to be enjoying themselves on the set of their Diet Pepsi commercial in Los Angeles.

'Mad' Pain

Thought I was happy when I heard "Mad Men" wouldn't be coming back till 2012 until I got my Season 4 DVD in the mail today and realized I had plenty of time to catch up. Maybe Peggy Olson can help relieve the pain.

Morning Wood

Cheyenne Jackson Gives Good Oral

The Broadway hunk tweets from his six-month checkup where he reports he was listening to Cher in the chair -- believe!

Wrap It Up ... I'll Take It!

Can't tell you how happy it makes me to see Louis C.K. is on the streets of Manhattan filming another season of his sublime FX show, "Louie." I was already a fan of his stand-up -- and his short-lived HBO show, "Lucky Louie" -- when I stumbled upon his latest creation, which he writes, directs and edits. I can't even remember which episode, or scene, it was, but I caught it completely out of context and thought it was the worst thing I'd ever seen. Thank god the accolades kept pouring in, because the next time I tuned in I was nearly in shock at what I was seeing. So smart and wickedly funny, yet so painfully sweet and tender, like a blue-collar, Irish-Catholic Larry David, only way more sensitive. (I think wealth adds to Larry's coldness.) So many of my favorite shows only lasted one season, so I will be incredibly curious to see if he can keep up the ridiculously high level of quality. The show seems so subtle, yet it stays with you in ways few shows can. If you haven't seen it, check it out on Netflix HERE.

Thoroughly Modern INSTINCT

In its April issue, Instinct examines the "State of Our Unions," with a look at sex, marriage and monogamy for the modern gay man. Cover couple Eric Turner and John Odom, who met online, have since moved in together and are planning a wedding. Instinct asks if these two are the modern gay relationship personified.

UPDATE: The verdict is in and -- big surprise -- people HAVE NOTHING NICE TO SAY about this dashing duo.

Hole in My Heart

I suppose for every Q&A session with Lisa Kudrow about "The Comeback" you hear about (thanks, Daryl), you're bound to miss something -- or a dozen things -- equally tantalizing, such as the reunion of Hole last night at MoMA. (Ouch! That hurt.) What could bring former bandmates Courtney Love, Eric Erlandson, Melissa auf der Maur and Patty Schemel -- who haven't played together in 13 years, unless by play you mean "sue" -- together after all this time? MoMA's screening of "Hit So Hard," P. David Ebersole's new documentary chronicling the life -- and near death -- of Schemel, the band's heroin-loving drummer. The film and the evening sound incredible. Schemel lived with Love and Kurt Cobain and was filming constantly, including the sessions of "Celebrity Skin" during which she quit the band under mysterious circumstances for good. Trailer below. Gothamist has the full report HERE. 

Head Over Heels for New Go-Go's Site!

With the 30th anniversary of the Go-Go's seminal debut album, "Beauty and the Beat," upon us, the gals are gearing up to hit the road this summer, for what is purportedly their "farewell" tour. (Cher could tell them a thing or two about those, but Diva Belinda claims she's really had enough.) Naturally, they needed their Web site overhauled to spread the big news, and who did they turn to? Their biggest fan and my BFF (really), Mark! I'm so impressed -- it turned out soooooo fun -- and can't help but think how inconceivable it would have seemed sitting in his bedroom on Pappstein all those years ago to imagine him doing a project for the band when we were 20 years older than they were then! (A deluxe edition of "Beauty and Beat" and a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame are coming, too!) Check out the fab new site HERE.

Missionary Position

Critics and fans are gaga for "The Book of Mormon" on Broadway. (Sorry, but Matt Stone and Trey Parker are the two least funny people in the world, in my humble opinion.) But "Hello Again," downtown, looks far more intriguing to me.

The Wright Scruff

David Wright, just the way I like him.

Rob Lowe Loses His Shirt for Vanity Fair

Still gorgeous at 47. I wonder if he still looks this good NAKED, in a JOCKSTRAP, or in a pair of TIGHTY WHITIES. (Vanity Fair via Towleroad)

Meredith Baxter Comes 'Untied'

When last we checked in with guest blogger Christopher, he was knee-deep in Meredith Baxter's emotionally unbalanced memoir, "Untied," and the accidental lesbian's life was about to change with the role that put her on the map, "Bridget Loves Birney."

Christopher reports:

When we last left our girl Meredith Baxter, she was being pandered to various casting agents by her PIMP, I mean manager/stepfather Jack. Finally, her whoring around Hollywood paid off and she was cast in the CBS series "Bridget Loves Bernie." The "Bernie" in this series about a young Irish Catholic elementary schoolteacher (Baxter) who falls in love with a Jewish cab driver, was none other than Mr. David Birney. Meredith states that she was immediately attracted to the "extremely handsome, dark haired, intense, lithe, and graceful" 32-year-old actor.

Read the full book report HERE.

Tuesday Ad Watch

"Over the Rainbow" in UK cologne commercial

James Franco Visits Letterman

Missed James Franco on David Letterman last night. Guessing he's promoting "Your Highness," anyone catch the interview?

UPDATE: A commenter notes that this interview is scheduled to air Friday. (Dave tapes his Friday shows in advance.)

Morning Wood

Rafael Nadal's Armani Underwear Ads Reveal He's No Becks

Rafael Nada's Armani ad photos are out and, I have to say, his bod doesn't look nearly as good as I thought it would. No? Either that, or the photographer should be shit-canned, stat. (The bottom ones are a little more flattering.)

WATCH: Woody Allen's 'Midnight in Paris' Trailer

Here's the trailer for the new Woody Allen movie, "Midnight in Paris." I see Owen Wilson is the latest Hollywood heartthrob to stand in for Woody. At least this one was neurotic enough in real life to try to take his own life, so it's a tad bit more realistic.