Page 1 Consider (04/28)

Groom With a View: Why would gay men in their 20s be rushing to the altar? Beats me. Why would anyone? (TimesMagazine)

Long Hot Summer: Rafael Nadal still has Roger Federer's number on clay. So far. (AP)

Going Long: He just got picked second by the Rams in the NFL Draft Is Howie Long's son Chris nearly as cute as Dad? Lest you forget, I used to carry Howie's photo in my wallet. (USA Today)

Cute Alert: Ruth Pogson, 83, and Beth Aime, 79, have proved you are never to old to marry. They tied the know in a nursing home in British Columbia. Congrats, ladies! (365Gay)

Bad Move: A lot of people took my recent post about Tina Fey the wrong way. I do like her -- "Weekend Update" hasn't been the same without her -- I just think she's been prematurely anointed the next Queen of Comedy. (I'm still waiting to laugh once during an episode of "30 Rock." Once.) If anyone doubted that I was right about this, just check out her star turn in "Baby Mama." Why she would agree to star in a two-hour one-joke skit (it was bad enough that she wrote one-joke skits for "Saturday Night Live" all those years, those only lasted a few minutes) is beyond me. (And another epidural joke????) Leave it to Manohla Dargis to break down the problem, beautifully. (NYT)

Datebook: New Mexico Gov. Bill Richardson (aka Judas), Pennsylvania Gov. Ed Rendell, Judy Shepard, Jim Hormel (the first out U.S. ambassador), and Joe Torsella (president and CEO of National Constitution Center) will attend the Equality Forum's International Equality Dinner on May 3 in Philadelphia. (Equality Forum)

Fashion Conspiracy: The 15-minute timer is running out fast for Barack Obama's Abercrombie boys. I'm ready for Hillary's Hollister dudes! (On Politics)

Happens Everyday: Nothing like the death of sibling to drive a married politician into a meth-fueled gay sex binge. (365Gay)

Wedding Vows: Till penis removal do us part -- or not. (NYT)

She's No June Cleaver: A British mother and daughter have been sentenced to five months in prison after being found guilty of harassing a gay couple in the town of Kingston, Kent County. (Advocate)

Daddy Dearest: If you thought Augusten Burroughs' mom was bad wait'll you read about his father. (NYT)

Planet Six-Pack

Hottie Mario Lopez leaves his mark in wet cement Friday during an appearance at the Planet Hollywood in New York's Times Square, where he promoted his new book, Knockout Fitness, and his new starring role in Broadway's "A Chorus Line." (People)

(WireImage)

TV Review: 'Be Real: Family Episode' on Logo

Season Two of Logo's groundbreaking series "Be Real" premieres tonight at 10 p.m. ET. In the episode, we meet two couples -- one gay, one lesbian -- looking to add a child to their families. Brian and James, a sweet young couple from Redding, Calif., went to their conservative county's foster-to-adopt program, and were placed with a baby girl. While the ever-looming risk of their daughter being taken away is intimidating -- the whole extended family is in love with little Lucca -- when adoption day arrives they are ever more grateful. For Amanda and Rebecca, a close childhood friend has offered to serve as their donor, but insemination is only the beginning. Because they live in Florida -- which we learned via Rosie O'Donnell is not gay-adoption friendly and where second parent adoption is banned -- the gals must find a place they can call home and be recognized as a family, even if it means leaving their heartbroken families behind.

The show is yet another wonderful slice-of-gay-life documentary from Logo, although this subject might not be for everyone. As I was watching it I started to wonder to myself, Is there something wrong with me for not wanting to have a child? (Now I know how straight couples without kids feel.) Truth be told, in my 40 years on this planet -- half of which as an out gay man -- I am only acquaintances with one gay guy who has ever opted to have a child and it only happened about a year a half ago (he used his sperm and a donor egg with his sister as the surrogate). I'm also blog pals with one other. I don't see any harm in spreading the word about the various options there are out there for gays and lesbians, but either this phenomenon is reported more often than it happens, or this baby trend hasn't hit my neck of the woods just yet. Check it out and see if your heartstrings are tugged in unexpected ways ...

The Marshall Plan

Michael and I saw "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" over the weekend. I was a big fan of "The 40-Year-Old Virgin," "Knocked Up" and "Superbad" and wondered why the latest film with the Judd Apatow stamp on it wasn't burning up the box office as those other three did. (For those keeping score, I didn't count "Walk Hard" or "Drillbit Taylor" because they weren't in that male-bonding genre that Apatow has become famous for.) Reduced expectations are always helpful, but I sure was surprised how funny and sweet "Sarah Marshall" was.

I'm half-thinking it's not as big a smash as its predecessors because it's (actually) too much of a chick flick to appeal to male audiences and disguised too much as a gross-out film to attract female audiences (What were they thinking with that completely misleading ad campaign -- YOU SUCK SARAH MARSHALL???) Not since "Swingers" has spending time with a heartbroken guy been quite this hilariously pathetic (DEREK!!!!). I'd rate it as one of Apatow Inc.'s best. (Maneater)

Mental Hospital Phone Menu

 

Hello and thank you for calling The State Mental Hospital. Please select from the following menu: 

If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. 

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you. 

If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and 6. 

If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line and we will trace your call. 

If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be forwarded to the Mother Ship. 

If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press. 

If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, nothing will make you happy anyway. 

If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969696. 

If you are bipolar, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep or after the beep. Please wait for the beep. 

If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. 

If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. 

If you have low self-esteem, please hang up. Our operators are too busy to talk with you. 

If you are menopausal, put the gun down, hang up, turn on the fan, lie down and cry. 

If you are blond, don't press any buttons, you'll just mess it up. 

This coming week is National Mental Health Care week. You can do your part by sending this to at least one unstable person to show you care. My job is now done.

Rugby's Coming Home

 And it's not wearing any clothes. (Do not watch at work, unless you're employed by a gay bathhouse.)