Page 1 Consider (09/26)

Suicidewatch: Did David Hasselhoff's daughter attempt suicide? If your father were that embarrassing, wouldn't you? (NBC)

Wild About Harry: Senator Harry Reid will take back calling President Bush a "loser." But no way is he gonna take back calling him a "liar." (NYT)

Young Guns: Notre Dame hottie Brady Quinn leads the Fighting Irish to a come-from-behind victory. (WP)

Minored in Paper Cuts: Why bother going to one of those elite schools like the University of Phoenix when you can get your Master's degree by reading Newsweek? (NYT)

Is Evildoer One Word or Two? If the U.S. government spent half as much time trying to locate Osama bin Laden as they do investigating Hewlett-Packard we'd have that evil doer by now ... (AP)

Presidential Blast-Off: Bill Clinton + FoxNews = explosive! (Newsweek)

Facts of Life: Oscar winner George Clooney shrugged off suggestions Monday that he might run for political office. Clearly, Most Pompous Man in Hollywood was an office he had no problem running for. (AP)

On His Shiite List: Mel Gibson criticizes Iraq war at film fest: "Of course, those damn Jew producers don't want the real story told!" (AP)

Self-Hate, the Work of God? Kyle Rice, a gay 19-year-old from Longview, Wash., writes on TheAdvocate.com that he "hates being gay." Funny, after reading his twisted essay I'm not too keen on his being gay either. (And his bangs kind of bug me, too.) (Advocate)

Dude Looks Like He's Diseased: I think the only way this would have been news if Steven Tyler somehow didn't have Hepatitis C. (ITV)

Virginia Is for Biggots: PC-challenged Senator George Allen just can't keep his racist foot out of his mouth. (AP)