Page 1 Consider (03/26)

This Just in From No Shit Newswire: A rep for Priscilla Presley says Elvis' ex was the victim of a bogus plastic surgeon. (People)

GayTube: "Funny gay dudes reviewing the latest cars" and "hot crooning shirtless guys strumming guitars on their Web cams" ... Daily Motion has added a new gay and lesbian portal to this YouTube style site. (DailyMotion)

Leech Therapy: Not only do most of Demi Moore's movie suck, so does her beauty regimen. (AH)

Party Crasher: In his new political memoir, former GOP senator Lincoln Chafee of Rhode Island rips into President Bush on gay marriage, war and abortion. Um. I hate to break it to you, Senator. But you're a Democrat. (AP)

Another Heartbreak: Twenty-five years of research and god knows how many millions (billions?) of dollars later and leaders at a "summit meeting" are saying an AIDS vaccine is nowhere close to being found. (WP)

Just Back From Zales: Jamie Lynn Spears' hot sperm donator borrowed her credit card to buy her an engagement ring. (People)

What a Drag: Memo to All: if you're ever going to go on Workers Comp saying you're too injured to work then don't allow yourself to be videotaped running a 40-yard-dash in women's clothing and high heels. (AP)

Ugly Report: Wanna know the secrets to a successful marriage? Marry an ugly guy. (DailyRecord)

Killer Aide: The defense in the Linda Stein murder case is making an issue of the fact that the so-called realtor to the stars had male DNA mixed in with her blood. Um, yeah. Have you seen her killer, Natavia Lowery? (DailyIntel)

L.A. Law: This trial of sleazy private eye to the stars, Anthony Pellicano, is supposed to be the talk of Hollywood, but every story I read is either about Garry Shandling (yawn) or so convoluted that I can't really get into it. Today, however, I finally recognized a few names, and learned that Freddy DeMann -- the Maverick Records executive and former manager of Madonna and other acts -- had paid some $80,000 to Pellicano to confirm his suspicions that his daughter’s husband was being unfaithful to her and that the husband was actually gay. (Now we're getting somewhere ...) (NYT)