One From the Hart(ley)

From my friend Derek Hartley's hilarious recap of this year's Hookies, aka the "Oscars of gay prostitution." (I went last year.) Apparently, porn producer Michael Lucas cornered Derek backstage at the event at Roseland -- they were both "presenters" -- and asked him to write a joke for Michael to use when giving out the award for “Best Top."

Derek explains:

I did come up with a joke for him: “I am here to present the award for Best Top. That is basically the biggest dick in New York. But I thought I was the biggest dick in New York.”

He didn’t really seem to understand the punchline. “But I don’t have the biggest dick in New York,” was his flat response. In the end, his moment in the spotlight was upstaged by a late arriving winner from a previous category and my joke never had a chance to be told.